Tag Archive: vacation


5 years and counting

This month marked our five year wedding anniversary.  Originally we had planned to celebrate it in Hawaii… but we moved instead.  When the day came that we had planned to fly there, I was most certainly bummed but as the days passed I was okay with it.  I focused on what we had planned to do.

It took me a while to decide on what we would do. I am the planner and Ben likes to sit back and show up when it’s time.  So all the planning I did was a surprise to him.  I finally decided on going to Seattle.  I booked a great hotel.. called Hotel 1000.  We would spend the weekend after our anniversary there since we had to work on our actual anniversary.

The morning of leaving.. we had some breakfast and headed north.  We made it to Seattle and went straight to the EMP.  They had some great exhibits there (a horror movie tribute, Jimmie Hendrex, and Nirvana).  It was fun to walk around and check out stuff that we both really love… scary movies and music.

From there we headed to the hotel to check in.  This place was top rate all the way.  It was by far the best hotel I’ve ever stayed in…. which says a lot since I am a bit of a hotel snob.  The service was phenomenal.  The room was really comfortable as well…. with a great bed and this awesome tub that fills from the ceiling! 

After we  dropped our stuff off we headed to Pike Place Market.  It’s a must see every time we go.  I love the energy of it.  We wandered around and found a place to have lunch.  It had a great view of the Puget Sound.  We sat by the window and opened it a bit to get some fresh air.  We were so lucky to get such great weather.  The sunshine was sandwiched some rainy days.

We walked around some more before heading back to the hotel to relax.   When we walked in, they had delivered a bottle of sparkling wine and chocolates while were out.  It was a nice touch. We stayed there till dinner.  I drew us a bath with bubbles.  We must have stayed in the tub for a hour.. drinking, chatting, and playing with the rubber duck.  It was sweet… and fun.. and romantic.  I loved every minute of it.

After we got ready and headed to dinner.  The hotel provided us transport in their town car.. which was nice not to have to take a taxi.  I had picked this steak house that I had heard great things about.  We spent two hours there…. and it was a wonderful two hours.  The meal was amazing…. and they had a few nice touches in honor of our anniversary.  They had set out confetti on the table and gave us a delicious chocolate dessert as a congratulations.

The whole day was wonderful.  It was the perfect mix of doing things and relaxing.  It was so nice to escape our everyday life and be together.

I can’t say enough about the time we’ve been together.  I couldn’t think of a better man to be with for all those years.  He has been the best husband, friend, Owner, etc. I could ever have asked for.  I love him more today than I did the day I married him… which is a whole lot.  We’ve had our ups and downs… but we’ve done it together.  We’ve grown together… learned together… loved together.  I know that this will always be the way we take on the world.  It’s just who we are.  We are devoted to one another.. wonderfully devoted.

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Punished- 10

I think some times as people we become complacent.  Admittedly.. I have become that… complacent… in my position as Ben’s slave.  It wasn’t on purpose by any means… merely the product of a set of events that have been in  motion for over a month.  It started when we went on vacation… and then fell ill right after we got home.  It was hard to keep up all the things I needed to do… and Ben took pity on me.  It was what needed to happen… in order for him to properly take care of me.  A broken and sick slave does no one any good.  I needed to heal… and given time.

This is all fine and dandy… had I resumed the same mentality that proceeded our vacation.  Somewhere in this… I hadn’t forgotten I was his slave… I just… became lazy.  It was easier to let things that I am do to fall to the side.  He wasn’t paying attention it seemed… (though in hind sight… I’m sure he was) and so it must not be important, right?  Well obviously it is important.. or he wouldn’t have made it a rule or task.

As of late, I’ve been forgetting more and more about my plug then asking to make up the time the following day.  I’ve taken advantage of his generosity in this.  Did I do this on purpose? Maybe a little.  To be honest, wearing my Njoy everyday is a bit daunting.    Sometimes I down right hate doing it.  I see the purpose in it… it was proven to me on our vacation.  I didn’t take my plug (with permission) on our trip because it just wasn’t practical.  When we came home and ended up having anal sex… it hurt so much more than in it had in a very long time.  My Njoy helps the pain a lot… more than I had realized.  So not only does this make my Owner happy… but it serves a very good sexual purpose for us both.

Last night.. was no exception.  I have been so busy lately trying to get the kids ready for going back to school, photographing a wedding and now editing said pictures, working, on top of all my household duties… its been a bit much for me.  I’m exhausted everyday.  Yesterday I went back to zumba finally after like a month off.. I had missed it so.  I didn’t get home till 6:30 and then had to make dinner and such.  I finally sat down around 8 or 8:30.  Before I realized it I had lost my window to wear my plug for two hours.  I asked Ben to make up my time tomorrow… he replied “triple time tomorrow”.  I tried to object… I was shocked… pouty… and mad.  It wasn’t fair.  How was I going to fit in time for that?  I didn’t object long before I realized I wasn’t going to win… just shut up and deal with it.  No reason to make the situation worse.

By bed time.. I was kneeling.. waiting for him to allow me in bed.  And he brought it up.  How long had it been since I had done a blog post.  I knew I had went over… I had told him I was going to do one on Monday I believe.  I failed to do so.  I had actually thought about it after the plug fiasco, but honestly, I was so tired from all that I’ve been doing it was the last thing that I wanted to do.  In my head I put it off for the next day and forgot about it.  But here we were… I was being  called out for it.  I was wrong… I knew I was wrong.  But didn’t he understand?  I’ve had so much on my plate, surely he would understand.

This is where a relationship like ours isn’t fair.  It is up to me to make it work.. or bring it to him to help me sort it out so that I can successfully do all that I am required to do.  I didn’t do that… I didn’t do anything in fact.  He asked me how many days it had been… I couldn’t tell him exactly.  I didn’t know.   He pulled me up and bent me over the bed.  I was inwardly outraged but obediently took my punishment.  He added up the three days that I had lapsed and hit me those three times with the hanger.  It’s not often I cry from a punishment but I felt the tears well up in me… and spill out of my eyes.  He pulled me to him… and I didn’t want him to touch me.  I was actually angry with him.  I am never angry when he punishes me but repentant.  I didn’t think this was fair at all…. even if I knew it was earned.  (Did I mention he is sick?  Yeah… bad slave that misbehaves so that her Owner has to punish her while he feels like crap).

He told me to get into bed and I asked if I could go blow my nose.  He said okay and I disappeared. I shut the bathroom door behind me and cried silently.  I didn’t want him to know I was so angry at me… because that leaves me vulnerable.  If I hadn’t been mad, I think I would have responded differently.  For a split second… I was pissed that our relationship was this way… and I didn’t want it to be anymore.  This was just wrong.  And then… almost instantly I knew I would regret that.  It’s amazing the things that being upset will make you think.

After I composed myself I climbed into bed and laid down… saying nothing.  I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of knowing what was going on in my head… again… bad slave.  He turned off the light… and as always… can tell read me like a book.  He inquired.  I had to admit I was angry with him… and he explained why he had punished me further.

He brought up an incident that happened the other day.  I had came home and he was no where to be seen.. I called out for him.. waiting at the door for him.  He said he was in the bathroom and would be out in a second.  Instead of waiting.. I just took it upon myself to decided I didn’t need to wait for him.  He never said anything… but apparently it was noticed.

He told me that he felt I needed a reminder of my place… and in all honesty.. I think he was completely right.  Even if I agreed with him and saw his rationale of this… I was still mad.  It surprised me that I was so upset… so inwardly defiant… even if I was outwardly obedient.  I just couldn’t get past being upset with him… and so I went to sleep… unhappy.

I woke up this morning and planned for today to be a better day.  I had six hours of plug wearing ahead of me… and I didn’t want to have to wear it to zumba.  The only option was to take it work with him… and so I packed it in my bag to be inserted a little later.  I followed through.. sending Ben proof that I was indeed wearing it.  I got a “good girl” and went about my day.  I wasn’t angry anymore.  I knew where I had messed up… and totally understood why I was in trouble.  Has my punishment worked?  Well I did my plug time and wrote my blog post… so I guess it has.  I hope it continues to be that way cause I hate being on his shit list!

sick days

It’s been a rough month for me health wise.  I’ve been sick just seven days shy of a month.. and honestly.. I am sick of being sick.  When we left for our vacation (July 19), the day we left my throat was kind of scratchy.  I chalked it up to allergies because nothing else was bothering me.  By the second day of our trip I had almost lost my voice, yet still felt fine.

When we got home I got some Claritin and all was well.  We were pretty tired from the time away and so we took it easy.  I went back to work on July 26th and started to feel poorly the next day.  I took Thursday as a sick day because I could barely move.  I suffered the rest of the weekend before finally deciding to go to the doctor on August 2nd.

She diagnosed me with bronchitis at that appointment.. gave me antibiotics and an inhaler.  She told me take a few days off from work and go back to work on Friday.  I used my sick days to relax and try to get better.  It was a slow recovery but by the time Friday rolled around I only had a cough and some congestion left.  I was feeling okay.

Saturday I took the final dose of my antibiotics and was hoping it wouldn’t be long before I felt like my old self again.  Sunday night, however, my body had other plans.  My head started killing me and I was really cold.   I woke up Monday morning with a 100.2 temp.  I went into work and did the things that only I can do and left after a hour to get to my doctors appointment.  By the time I made it to the appointment, my temperature had spiked to 102.  This time.. I was diagnosed with strep throat.

She gave me a few options medication wise and I chose the easiest (and most painful one I might add) option.. a shot in the ass.  I was kind of amazed I had strep as my throat wasn’t that sore, but what do I know.  The rest of that day I was stricken with fever after fever.  It was pretty miserable.  Today, the fevers are almost all gone, but now my throat and ears really hurt.  I’ve not been able to eat a whole lot.. not that I’m really that hungry.  I thought for sure I’d be feeling better by now.. but it all seems to be such a slow process.  Right now I’m trying to decide if I should take another day off work.  I don’t know.

All I can say is I am totally over this.  It doesn’t feel like I’m ever going to be healthy again. I’ve never been this sick for so long… and its wearing me down.   It certainly lives no time to serve Ben.  He’s been wonderful though.. looking after me and making sure I’m doing all that I need to do in order to get well.   I miss the the way things should be…. when I’m healthy.  I really hope this is the last of this crap and I’m on the mend for real this time.   I want to post about fun stuff… not miserable, sickly girl stuff.  I just want to be well… and at my Owner’s whim. 🙂

We just returned from vacation last night… and it was certainly a good one.  We visited the Redwood forest, the Oregon Caves, and Crater Lake in Oregon.  It was a whirlwind vacation… were were always on the go and packed in so much.  We had a whole lot of firsts which was really awesome to experience as a family.  The kids ranked this vacation as their second favorite… only bested by Disneyland.  Who’d have known a camping trip would rank so closely to the happiest place on Earth?  In any case, it makes me smile to know they had an amazing time.

If you read my last post… you will know how stressed and cranky I was going into this vacation.  Unfortunately, that didn’t fade with the 1,221 miles we traveled.  There were many instances I was a real pain in the ass.  I let my stress and my need to control things get in the way.  At home it’s easy.. things stay the same… they are predictable.   On vacation… nothing is predictable other than the things we planned to do and see.

Then there was Ben’s crankiness… which I feed off of.  Some how we kept getting each other wrong… I’d say something that he would hear the wrong way… and we’d end up snapping at each other.  It was a horrible feeling.  I felt like he just criticizing here and there… and it was wearing me thin.  Don’t get me wrong, we had a good time and lots of wonderful moments.. but I will always remember those moments where I wasn’t very slave-like… where I disrespected my Owner… and I have to say… I’m pretty ashamed of my actions.

The worst moment was when we were packing up camp… and I just lost it.  I was super cranky… and disrespectful.  I could see myself doing it.. and couldn’t stop myself.  I let it get the best of me.   There I was…. being scolded… being told to knock it off and I couldn’t shake that defiant feeling.  I couldn’t let go of my annoyance… my crankiness, try as I might.

I didn’t know what awaited me when I got home… I knew I had been way out of line.  I knew that he understood why I had behaved the way I had, but that didn’t excuse it… it was no reason.  I am his slave and he demands respect.  If I won’t give him that.. there is a price to pay.  Deep down I hoped that he would punish me.  I needed that correction… that guidance to get back on track.  After we unpacked and showered… by the time it was bed time I did my nightly devotion.  When he came to me, I was bowing before him and he talked to me… asking me stuff.. about my behavior on our trip.

He told me that I would be punished and then I would pleasure him after- not severely.. but punished nonetheless.  I knew I had it coming… and I still dreaded it.  I knew that meant I’d be spanked with the hanger… and I hate it.  I took it with grace though.  I had accepted the punishment before he even said anything about it… I knew I had earned it.

Once each blows were administered… I served my owner… and swallowed every last drop of his cum.  And like that, my sins were washed away.  We would move on from this point.  There is no need to dwell on it… but learn from my actions.  I can’t say it won’t happen again, but I certainly will try for it not to happen.  I like being his well behaved slave.. one he can count on to remember her place, not a bratty, unruly slave.  Now that we are home.. things will settle down and I can go back to being more like myself.  This is a good thing.

cranky girl

We are leaving to go camping today.  It’s been a stressful process getting everything put together and packed.  I haven’t been the most patient, nor well behaved slave.   I’ve been snappy… and irritable.  The pressure of getting it all done and making sure we have everything has gotten to me.  It makes me pretty unbearable to be around… and it’s down right embarrassing that a woman of my age would behave like that.  Sometimes I just let things get the best of me… and then I’m out of control.

Honestly, Ben has been a saint and put up with my grouchiness… heaven knows why.  I’m not sure why he hasn’t bent me over the bed and given me a sound spanking.  I know I need it… and I know I won’t be able to ask for it as the kids being home makes it hard to have spankings during the week.  I haven’t had a spanking in over a week.. and I can feel it in every inch of my body.

Over the weekend.. he worked too much and when we did have the opportunity to do so, we used it to reconnect after many days of not having much time together.  At the time, it was just what we needed… and I felt really good afterwards.  But now that I’m neck deep in vacation work… I feel the lack of a spanking eating away at me.  It’s making me a disrespectful brat to be honest.

Deep down I just want him to grab me by the hair and drag me to our room to tell me to knock my crap off.  He knows how stressed I am and I imagine that’s a big part of why he hasn’t.  I’m sure he thinks it would make matter worse, though I don’t think I agree with that.  I think I need his strong hand.. keeping me in line.  I feel poorly about my behavior… and will be apologizing to him later.  Though.. perhaps I should just pull my head out of my ass so that there is nothing to apologize for.

Vacations are supposed to relaxing but at the moment I feel frazzled.  I hope that once we are out and about I will chill out and enjoy it.   I’d hate to need a vacation from my vacation…. and I’d really hate to earn myself a punishment.  Though… I feel like I’ve already earned one.  This stubborn and cranky girl needs to be put in her place.  I’d hate to be my Owner right now!