Category: sex

>If you haven’t read part one yet… feel free to do so here. 🙂

When we got up to our room.. I kicked off my heels. I was certainly happy about that after hiking half a mile back to hotel. That sure doesn’t SEEM like a lot… but when you don’t wear heels a lot, it sure is. I walked over to the huge windows and pulled open the curtains. I looked out over the city towards the Space Needle all lit up… and smiled. It had been a wonderful night…. quite possibly one of the best dates we have ever been on.

Ben walked up behind me… wrapping his arms around me. We stood there together.. soaking in the beautiful sight and just enjoying being together. I closed my eyes and sighed… knowing that this moment was perfect- that nothing else mattered at that second but being there with him.

Minutes passed before I felt the warm touch of his lips on my neck. My eyes stayed shut… as they continued down my neck to my left shoulder. I turned my head back just enough for me to open my eyes to see him just for him to look up at me. My breathing was already shortening…. my body already tingly and needing him.

Our lips met… kissing each other wanting to encompass each other. I shifted.. turning around to face him… he wrapped his arms around me pulling my body into his. Our hands wandered… my hands reached around running my fingers over the fabric that covered his ass.

His mouth parted from mine… and back to my neck causing my head to fall to the side allowing him access. In my daze… he had unzipped my dress…. and then pulled it down off my shoulders. It fell to the ground, a puddle at my feet leaving me only in my bra in front of him. I took the opportunity to pull his shirt out of his pants then started unbuttoning it…. wanting him in the same state of undress as me.

Once all the buttons had cleared the holes…. I ran my hands up his chest… our mouths busy with each other. I reached his shoulders then pushed the fabric off him… adding to the pile at our feet. Quickly my fingers went to work on his belt… unbuckling it.. then to his pants. Before long… we were both completely naked.

Ben pushed me to the floor… and I wasted no time taking his cock into my mouth. He sighed with pleasure finally feeling the wetness of my orifice. I went slow at first…. on my knees… while he looked out over the city, knowing that at any minute someone from the neighboring apartments could see in. What a show that would have seen.

My pace picked up.. his hand on my head…. his hips meeting my movements. He was becoming rougher… taking charge in only the way he can do to me. He pulled away… turning me then pushing my face down, leaving my ass in the air. Ben straddled me and slid in with such force it took all I could for my face not to rub against the carpet.

He slammed into me over and over…. I still struggled to keep my head away from the carpet… it certainly was a challenge. It was a balancing act between pleasure and pain… so much so… I wasn’t sure how I felt about it… but I went with it anyway.

Finally he decided I had enough…. and got off me… pulling me onto the bed. I laid on my side giving him entrance to any hole of his choosing. My leg hooked his waist pulling him to me… till I felt the head of his cock press against my ass. He pressed gently… I gasped… then asked for lube (that I had conveniently packed for such an occasion… always be prepared for anything on vacation I say).

He reached over to the end of the bed where our black backpack was laying…. I guided him to the right pouch. He pulled it out… drizzled some on us both… then guided his cock into my ass. As always he met some resistance but slowly kept to his task of stretching. When he finally was in to the hilt… he gradually moved in and out… getting the muscles to relax and accept the intrusion.

Once I was just as much into it… over the initial pain…. he quickened his motion. My hand was on his chest… moaning with pleasure….. the other on my clit. Time faded away… I don’t know how long we were at it before I begged him to cum. I needed to feel him fill me… to fill my ass…

My fingers moved up to his nipple… tweaking it… knowing that would push him over the edge. His movements started to become ragged… I knew he was close. I knew all I had to do…. just a few words…

“Cum in my ass please”.

His eyes snapped shut…. a few more thrusts… and then his body shook… and he grunted with each spurt inside of me. A couple more thrusts left him completely spent… he pulled out… then laid down next to me. I curled up into his arms. It was just after midnight by then… our anniversary.

“Happy Anniversary baby… I love you”, I said… laying my head on his chest and sighing.

The perfect date indeed.


>the dress

>I had looked far and wide for a dress for our upcoming (now passed) anniversary weekend away. You see, I’m really not a big fan of dresses. I not 100% sure why that is… I just know that I don’t like them… and I know… I don’t think most are very flattering on me.

About a week before we were supposed to leave…. I had enough. I hadn’t found a dress… and the ones I had found quite frankly sucked ass. So.. I gave up. I was going to wear my black and blue pin striped pants. The thing is I wanted to find a new shirt to wear.

Friday I set out to find a new shirt on lunch. Much to my surprise.. I found a ton of dresses that I loved… weird. I tried them all on… and one of them was just “it”. I was thrilled.. and more so when it was 50% off! Sweet deal.

Friday was the last day of work before my ten day vacation started. When I got home… Ben was just getting home around the same time. I told him about the dress then tried it on… with the shoes and earrings I planned on wearing. Ben said…. “cute”. I laughed and said I didn’t want to look cute.

Ben wanted to pop into the shower before my niece and her fiance showed up and so I was going to go to take off the dress. He walked up behind me.. and wrapped his arms around me.

“The best thing about a dress… is this…”, he said… as his hand snaked down my thigh and hiking up my skirt. His fingers worked their way around to the round of my ass… making me exhale. Before I knew it… his fingers were working their way to my pussy… to my clit.
I pushed my ass back and against him… feeling his hardness against me…. and I must say.. I loved every moment of it.

Then out of no where… he bent me over the bed.. and slammed deep inside of me. He pounded away… the moans slipping from my lips. I could hear the tinkle of my dangly earrings with each thrust. I felt deliciously slutty. The kind of slut that is only brought out by the best lover. The kind of slut that the sophisticated woman wants to be… and is only made to be so when its forced upon them.

He pulled out.. only to let me shed my garments… and head to the shower. Inside the bathroom I was fucked before I could turn the shower on…. more inside the shower… twice before he finally decided that what he really needed was to cum inside of his wife.

I think he liked the dress.


>Because every night isn’t something outta an erotica blog….

I laid there in bed… Ben’s arm draped over me. I could feel the warmth of his body as he scooted closer to me. His cock managed to mold into the crease of my ass… fitting there like it’s where it belonged. It’s very own haven.

At first… my mind wandered.. thinking of random stuff as I often do before I fall asleep.. but tonight.. that wasn’t going to work. I became acutely aware of his body.. and I could feel the warmth grow between my legs. That deep seeded need to feel his cock deep inside of me awoke… just as I was awake.

I knew it wasn’t going to happen…. but that certainly didn’t mean I didn’t WANT it to happen. I laid there listening to the rhythm of his breathing.. trying to focus on that.. and not the gnawing need to roll over and rape him. This, however, proved not to be very distracting.

I couldn’t lay like that anymore.. there was no way I was falling asleep with him against me. I wiggled free and with an almost fluid motion.. we both rolled over. I wrapped my arm around him.. getting as close as I could. And still after minutes passed… I was no closer to sleep. All I could think of at this point was that I wanted to just fall asleep. I wanted to dream of other things than desire… to rest…because I obviously was not getting the other need met.

Damn it. Sometimes one just needs to get fucked… in order to fall asleep. Alas… I finally gave up and got up hoping that tiredness will over take me so when I do finally go back to bed.. fucking him will not be all I can think of. (wow that was quite the run-on sentence!)


>We were laying on the bed.. all the wrong way. My legs were over the side with my back flat against the mattress. Ben was up next to me… laying there in a perfect little silence. Minutes passed before Ben said we should go get a shower.

He got up…. taking his shirt off. I watched him as he disappeared from the room. I heard him call for me.. asking if I was coming. I was…. just not that very second. I closed my eyes and imagined how I had wanted that moment to go…

On my back… my shirt rose a little.. leaving a little strip of skin exposed above my jeans. I could imagine his fingers tracing the waistline. I could imagine his hands working north… feeling my smooth skin under his fingertips. He would keep moving till he reached the bottom band of my bra slipping underneath.

He’d trace that band as well… inching up a tad.. to feel my nipple… all hard and ready to be teased. He’s slip his whole hand inside… wrapping it around the full of my breast.. squeezing it gently much to my approval. Before leaving… he’d gently pinch the hardness.. exciting a moan from me.

He’d move south again… exploring a different route this time. This time when he reached my jeans, he’d unbutton them. Slowly unzipping them.. his fingers would move inside… grazing over the smooth lips of my pussy making my breathing grow more rapid.

He’d remove them… and use the other to pull my jeans down my legs. He’d inch up my legs to the inside of my thighs.. kissing gently. When he reached my pussy… he’d lick slowly… teasing my clit.. making my body writhe under his tongue. His hands would move back up… under my bra and pinch both of my nipples again.

And this is where my imagination stopped as the husband was calling for me again. I got up in my dreamy state and joined him in the shower.. leaving my thoughts in the bedroom.

>When it’s been a while between our more aggressive sexual adventures…. it’s funny the emotions I go through. It ranges from uneasiness (over reconditioning my mind and body to accept intense pain) to pure excitement. This was the case Saturday night.

I hadn’t been sleeping well and so after the third night of this.. I decided it was time we rotated the mattress. Ben came into the room… I had already pulled the blanket, sheet, and pillows onto the floor. I was only wearing a thsirt… my ass barely peeking out. As I bent I felt his hand rub against my exposed skin. I let out a sigh… making sure he knew I liked it.

His fingers traced the line of my ass… giving way to the soft skin of my pussy. I gasped when I felt his fingers rub my clit somewhat roughly. He gave it a few strokes before moving his fingers back.. and plunging into me. I pushed back against his hand… and whimpered when they left after only a minute.

We went about turning the bed… and as we were putting the stuff back on… I was bent over the bed again fixing the covers. I didn’t even notice him coming up behind me… and planting a firm smack on my ass. His hand hand up on my back… holding me down…. then applied several more swats to each cheek.

He let me up after… saying it was shower time. The shower was uneventful…. each of us showering in silence only glancing up at each other here and there exchanging a smile or a knowing look. When I finally exited.. I did my after shower routine… as Ben had already left the bathroom. I listened as I brushed my teeth… hearing the tell tale sounds of our toy drawer. I felt the fear somewhat grow in my stomach. It had been weeks since I had endured any sort of prolonged pain. I also felt the excitement of the impending treatment…

I couldn’t draw it out anymore… and walked out of the bathroom only to be met by Ben.. holding two of my vibrators. He handed them to and told me to make sure they were clean (apparently they hadn’t been used in a while…who knew that drawers got so dusty). As I washed them… he came in for a towel.

I followed him into the bedroom.. and this is where my memory gets hazy. Its funny how more intense something is.. the harder it is to remember.

I was pushed over the corner of the bed…. no warm ups… just powerful blows from the flogger… over and over. The first ones had no rhythm to them… so hard to stay focused and not cry out. Soon, though, his assault had a steadiness to it.. that allowed me to sink into a quiet enjoyment.

He wouldn’t allow that for long… dragging me to my knees… slamming his cock down my throat. He fucked my face while he continued working on my back and ass. As he did so…. he told me that he wanted me to present parts of my body for him to whip… which made me shudder. There is something about choosing your fate so to speak that makes it all the more hard to endure.

He pulled away… and instructed me to go ahead and show him where to spank. I thought for a second… and turned… getting on my hands and knees. I arched my back and stuck my ass in the air. He did not hesitate.. and just as quickly as I had got into position… the first blow fell across my ass. Over and over the flogger falls made contact with my skin.. sometimes making me scream… other times making me moan.

Soon he was ready for a new target… and urged me to pick something else. I sat up a bit laying across the bed… pointing to my back. There was a confidence in that choice… as it’s my favorite place to be flogged. He moved onto my newly selected spot. Strike after strike… I laid there enduring what he dished out.

After a bit.. I was told to pick a new spot. I pointed to the backs of my thighs this time. He only got a few hits in on this spot. One blow hit the side of my thigh… wrapping around… that brought forth such pain. I gasped… and screamed.. and felt my chest tighten trying to find air…. and the tears filling my eyes. I begged him to stop…

“Why?”, he said… dripping with condescension.

“Because it hurts”, I choked out.

“But it’s supposed to hurt, isn’t it? And you like it, don’t you?”, he was all smiles… I could tell without even looking.

“Yes”, was all I could respond with… between deep breaths trying to keep from completely falling apart.

He knew I didn’t want him to stop.. and pressed forward to picking another spot. For whatever crazy reason (maybe because I know how much he likes it), I picked my pussy. I rolled over.. spreading my legs for him. He offered up his cock to help distract me from the attack I was about to feel.

I took him deep into my mouth… and his soothing words rolled from his lips… asking if I was ready. And so… he began…. getting in a few good hits before I couldn’t take more. The tears came back to my eyes. I could feel panic filling me… but he has a way of calming me… bringing me back to where he needs me to be.

Soon I was laying there.. legs spread… willing to accept more. He was going to give me one more…. one more good one. The fear grew in me…. waiting.. wondering when it’d come… my mouth full of his cock again. Then out of no where.. the last stinging blow hit my tender flesh. I pulled my legs up to me… laying in a ball. There was no stopping the tears this time.. as they streamed down my face.

He told me to breathe… to calm myself… as he moved around to the other side of the bed. He got me off the bed… I leaned in to suck his cock again… but was met with resistance. The wood handle of the flogger was at my throat.. causing me to struggle to reach even the tip. I struggled.. pushing harder.. digging the wood into my throat to finally reach my prize.

Satisfied with my struggle…. he removed the flogger. I moved my head up and down… fucking him with my mouth. Words flowed from his mouth as I did as I was expected.

“So I guess I should tell you what I have planned for you tonight. Those two vibrators you cleaned are going into your pussy…. and I’m going to fuck your ass. Like that idea?”, he asked… as if he was talking about what he had for lunch.

I could feel the dread coming over me. I don’t prefer being fucked in the ass when we play harder… my body isn’t as relaxed as it needs to be to allow him to do so without hurting me. So.. yeah, I wasn’t looking forward to it.

He pulled away from me… and told me to get onto the bed on my back. I did so…as hee pulled me to him… my legs spreading again. There wasn’t pain.. but pure pleasure as he slid deep into my pussy.. filling me. I cooed…. enjoying the reward I had earned.

His arms wrapped around my thighs… fucking me… my fingers wandered down… and started rubbing my clit. My eyes shut and went with it… fully enjoying all the sensations that flowed through my body. This wouldn’t be all I’d get though…. soon I found myself void of his cock…. and had my cunt filled with the first of two vibrators.

I took the first one with ease. One is no problem by any means. He fucked me vigorously with it…. making sure I was nice and wet (like that’s any problem). He only stopped to slid the other in… stretching my pussy out. I felt so full…. words escape me in how to accurately describe it.

He pushed my knees up further.. getting better access to my ass. Normally I would put up some resistance… but honestly I was pretty far gone by then… so I laid there… letting him do whatever he wanted.

With one hand.. he held the vibrators in place.. and the other.. he squeezed a ton of lube into the slit of my ass. I heard him set the bottle down… then felt the tip of his cock press against me. I had very little fight in my body.. which was probably a good thing… and worked in my favor.

I felt him slip inside of me… pressing further and further… not giving me much time to adjust to the stretching of my ass. I reached down again… rubbing my clit.. trying to keep the focus on something more enjoyable. Finally when he was all the way in… he begin pumping in and out… more forceful than he’d normally be.

After a few more minutes of his cock and the vibrators fucking me… I asked him for more lube as my body was tensing and it was starting to hurt. He obliged me… then went back to the task at hand.. sliding back in and not giving any adjustment time.

By then I was so far gone… the sensations were overwhelming.. and I could feel myself deep in subspace.. where very little could touch me. I’m not even sure how much time passed…. or how many times my body trembled with orgasms. Though, at some point.. his seed spilled into my ass. When his orgasm subsided he pulled out… then pulled the vibrators out.

I pulled away… curling into a ball… as he slipped into bed up behind me enveloping me in his arms. This is when the whole experience washed over me…. and tears poured from my eyes.. like this wonderful release of anything bad that I felt. In that very second… I was wonderful… and felt just.. well good.

Moments like that are probably hard to describe or understand unless you’ve experienced them. I’ve had very few experiences like that… and I wouldn’t trade them for the world…. they are simply amazing.

It took me almost a hour to full snap out of it… and be completely normal… but it was so totally worth it. It was good stuff indeed.

>We laid in bed.. talking… cuddling.. just being together. Ben was on his back… and I was propped up on my elbow. I looked down at him… and he has this particular look in his eyes.. one that is hard to describe. It was like… kindness… adoration.. love.. lust… all rolled into one. It was overwhelming… in this… oh my god, I love this man kinda way.

I leaned into him… gently rubbing my nose against his… sharing a moment that was just simple.. and pure. Seconds seemed like minutes… and time could have stood still. Before I knew it… out lips touched… the passion between us ignited.

What started out as something gentle… became intense want and lust. His knee came up between my legs… wedged up against my pussy. I put my hand to his neck… lightly placing it against his collar bone. His hands wandered… up and under my shirt. His fingers dug into my back… making every nerve ending in my body come alive.

We kissed intensely… almost like we couldn’t get enough of one another. Soon he was pulling my shirt off…. and I laid back against him. I kissed him more… as he reached down and started stroking his cock. I love it when he does that… something about it makes me so freaking hot.

I finally couldn’t take anymore… and climbed on top of him… rubbing against his cock through our shorts. We grinded against one another…. fueling the want and need we had to partake in. His fingers once again raked across my back… then down to the band of my shorts.

I rolled away… letting him pull down my shorts… then his own. I wasted no time.. and climbed back on top of him. I rubbed my clit against the tip of his cock… making me suck in air… enjoying the sensation.

Moving my hips up… Ben guided his cock into my soaking wet pussy. I took him deep inside…. feeling every inch of him. His hands where all over… digging into my thighs.. my back… my tits. It felt amazing… and before I knew it… I was rocked with an orgasm so intense that I squeezed his cock out of me.

I leaned in and kissed him again as I slid back down on him fucking him vigorously. His hips rose to meet my own…. with one purpose alone… to make him cum. I bounced up and down… sighing and moaning with each thrust. I could tell by the look on his face.. and the force in which his fingers were buried into my flesh that he was close.

With each assualt.. I could feel the muscles in my pussy tighten… and I imagine it was all too much to take anymore. Ben filled my cunt with his cum… and then we collapsed into a pile of flesh… holding each other in a quiet contentment.

>where were you at 5 am?

>It’s been a while since I’ve woken up in the middle of the night horny enough to actually do something about it… call it old age… or whatever (though I know I’ll be told that I’m not old)… I just haven’t in a while. Sleep is so very precious to me…. but in the same thought.. so I sex. So yeah.

I had woke up several times… all warm and sleepy. Each time I wanted him… but sleep would retake me just as I’d scoot up against Ben’s body… molding mine to the contour of his. Curling my groin up and around his ass that I love so much. Then… I’d drift off to dream land.

The last time I woke up was around five am. This break from sleep was much more powerful…. I was more awake than any of the other times… and this time.. the urge overtook the need to sleep. I was still snuggled up behind him from previous bouts of wakefulness.

My head slid down his chest to his hip where I rubbed a few times before just saying screw it… and going for the prize. When my fingers reached his cock… I was pleasantly surprised to find it hard and waiting for me. I wasted no time and wrapped my fingers around… slowly stroking him at first. He woke up almost instantly.. or was he already awake?

My speed picked up… and soft cries of pleasure escaped his lips. He moved…. and my hand moved with him.. till he was on his back… reaching over to find my willing pussy. We laid there.. working each other over… till the urge to fuck was too strong.

I rolled over… and stuck my ass out. Seconds later my cunt was met with a very sudden fullness. I groaned… I love that initial feeling… its simply amazing. Our hips began to move together… not wasting time… the middle of sleep is not the time to go slowly. Its about getting what you want and then going back to sleep all satisfied.

We only stayed like this for a few minutes before I rolled onto my back…. him on his side still. Our hands found one another… touching in the darkness…. his hand gently grasping me. I set back to my task at hand… moving my hips up and down on his cock… feeling an orgasm growing. Somewhere in there… his other hand found my clit. He roughly handled me… and I was a goner.

My head went back as I cried out… explaining an orgasm… now there is a task isn’t it? I didn’t stop though… I kept fucking him as mine subsided…. my hands reaching out for his chest. My fingers brushed against his nipple. I grabbed it between my fingers… gently tweaking it.

I could feel his body tense under me…. I knew that he was almost there…. so I continued… not making it more intense. Just sticking with what was working. Then before I knew it… he convulsed… spilling his seed into me.. filling me.

When it subsided… we parted and curled up into each other.

“Where did that come from”, he asked.

“I was horny.”, I said matter of factly, “besides, it seems that you were too”.

>a glimpse

>………was inside of me… deep to the hilt.. filling me full. I was on top of him.. facing away… and slowly started to grind against him.. making circles with my hips. His hand moved up my spine to my shoulder… grasping it with his hand. I love when he grabs my neck or shoulders firmly…. there is something so dominant about it…. I love how my body reacts.

Before I knew it his other hand came up… and both wrapped around my neck. He pulled me back…. till I was almost laying against his chest. I laid perfectly still… as did he. I focused on staying calm… trying to conserve what air I had in my lungs. Every few seconds I’d gasp for air a little…. only he didn’t let up. It was… hot.

We laid like this for a few minutes… before I couldn’t take it anymore. I moved my hips up and down… his hands still about my throat. The silent room was penetrated by the sounds of my wet pussy…. soon he joined me… fucking me with such vigor that….

>out of the haze

>It was late… we had been out… and it was time for sleep.

Ben and I kissed and said good night… then I rolled over… scooting back into his body. His arm draped around me pulling me closer. His hand migrated quickly.. finding a resting spot on my shoulder. He slowly whisked his fingers back and forth. Electricity flew through my body…. I had been horny for some time… teasing the caged animal is never nice.

In my head… all I could think was “don’t start something you can’t finish”…. and part of me wanted to say it.. butttttt I didn’t want him to stop. In which he did- but replaced it with his leg sliding up and down on mine. This.. my friends.. is a very good sign. This.. is not some random affection.

In my state (I had been drinking), some of the details are fuzzy.

His fingers snaked around… up my thigh and between my legs. They parted slightly…. giving him ample room to do his work. He touched me… and I sighed… finger the pressure on my clit. Minutes passed.. him working me over… me wiggling as I could feel the orgasm growing.

Ben leaned into my ear, “I want you to suck my cock”…. and of course… I eagerly turned to do so. My lips parted… taking just the head of his cock into my mouth. I swirled my tongue around… taking my time. Inch by inch I would go deeper with each bob of my head till I was at the base…. hitting the back of my throat.

From there things get a little hazy. At some point… he grabbed a handful of hair… pulling me to the edge of the bed where he slammed his cock back into my mouth… slowly fucking it. His hands wandered… roughly finding things to keep his fingers occupied with. Though… I certainly didn’t mind.

Soon he bent forward… pushing himself deeper.. face next to my sex. He opened his mouth and sunk his teeth into my tender flesh. I groaned with a full mouth.. not expecting the harsh treatment. He bit over and over… different places… different amounts of pressure till he finally rewarded my pain with pleasure.

His tongue danced over my clit… flicking it with vigor… making my body squirm. My fingers sank into his thighs… my breathing quickened. Until. He stopped.

He turned me over.. and plunged hard and deep into my wet pussy… the time for teasing.. was done. I pushed back into him… our motions became one together. My fingers dug into the sheets… moaning and screaming. His hands…. on my hips.. pulling me into him. And time passed…. the world stood still… all that mattered then… was that.

When he came… we collapsed into each other…. all tired and content. It was time to sleep though.. the red numbers stared back at us…. 2:57 am. Time for bed indeed.

>Ben and I were recently asked if we wanted to play with another couple and to go to a swingers party. It SOUNDS sooo exciting. I was bummed when we didn’t go (I got over it though). But of course.. there are a few things that keeps this from happening.

  1. Ben and I are both kinda possesive of each other. Let me clarify that… we don’t really want to share each other with someone else. Having friends.. and doing things outside of each other are A okay…. but as far as being intimate with another… I think this would be very traumatic for each of us. Sooo for us to join another couple… this is sharing… and well.. yeah.. probably end with some hurt feelings.
  2. Ben is not comfortable having sex in front of others… no pictures.. not in the same room… not on cam. The idea of it.. just is not appealing to him. Me on the other hand… I think this is incredibly exciting. I have really come into my own voyeurwise in the last few years. There is something very, very erotic about watching another person/couple in the midst of something sexual. But again.. that’s just me. We are a couple… and so we have to find a common ground to where both will be comfortable.
  3. Past experience…. I’ve been down this road. I trust Ben completely.. but those bad memories… still taint my mouth. In fact… I completely trust said couple as well. They are awesome. This is my hang up.. no one else’s.

Despite this stuff.. it doesn’t keep me from thinking about how fun it COULD be. I feel like we kinda missed out on a great experience.. but if he’s not in it all the way… then I’d rather not do it at all. Keeping our healthy, happy relationship is way more important to me than one night of craziness.

What I do get from this is…. really hot masturbation material! So its not a complete waste!