Category: fighting

>I have always been hesitant to air our dirty laundry… I didn’t want to be THAT girl that bitched and moaned about her husband. The fact is… I adore him with my every being… I love him… and plan on spending our lives together. No matter if I am upset with him… or completely happy.. that does not change.

With that said.

Our only ongoing issue in our relationship.. has been sex. Sex is very important to me… always has been. Its part of how I identify myself. I am a very sexual person… period. Ben.. no so much. He is okay with having sex a couple times a week… and leave it at that. He’s not the type to spend time looking for new things to do.. or watch porn without me. It’s not at the front of his mind… almost ever.

For me.. that’s really not so true. I think about sex everyday… multiple times a day. I like thinking about new things… looking for new things. I could happily have sex almost everyday… and be good to go.

There is not a huge difference in the amount we want sex… but it is very noticeable to me sometimes. I am very touchy feely… in a sexual way sometimes…. even if I’m not necessarily trying to initiate sex. Sometimes… my goal is just for him to want me…. to have that want build till later. He doesn’t always get that… the point of it. And so this leads to my feelings being hurt.. because he pushes me away.

About every six to eight months… we do this dance… where it comes to a head… mainly because when it comes up.. we put a quick patch on it and move forward. We never really come to any answers to how to meet in the middle. And so things start back all hot and heavy… and slowly move to the other… and culminates in me being butt hurt and him feeling like he can’t perform to what I need.

I’m really tired of this dance… tired of it coming to that.. because honestly we’re better than that. We can work out our differences.. we are intelligent adults. So thats where we are. It will all work itself out.. its just trying to figure out how to get to that point.

We are both trying to figure out what exactly we need and what we want. When we do, we’ll sit down and talk.. compare.. and figure out the middle ground. It will be work to figure out something new.. and make it work… but I know we can.


>I laid in his arms… him on his back.. me curled into his body. The calm after the storm… the uncertainty in the wake of the fight we just ended. Although it was done… I was still holding on.. holding onto the words he said… and the hurt it caused.

His fingers traced the curves of my back… gently caressing my warm skin. Our breathing shallow… but rhythmic. The room was quiet… only the soft hum of the fan above us spoke. I needed air… I needed away just to keep the monster inside calm. I kissed him… told him I loved him.. because no matter what.. that remains true.

After pulling away and laying on my back… my reluctant hand touched his leg… not wanting the gap between us to grow so large that tears would come flowing back. Minutes passed… and again… his advancement came. His hand touched my body… gently… wanton.

He outlined my chest.. down my stomach.. to my thighs.. barely passing by my pussy. In my head… I wanted nothing of it… I didn’t want to give in…. to let go. But.. as always.. my body betrays my mind… it reacts to the touch of the man I love.

My mind fights though.. not letting down the barrier that easily. With every stroke of his fingers… the lust wells in my body… yet inside… the battle goes on… there is no way it will allow me to enjoy this seduction. Still he presses on. More and more brave as time passes.. till his fingers dive into my wet cunt. A groan escapes his mouth at the welcome they are met with. The warm, wetness envelopes his digits… urging him on.

The arousal is almost too much to fight anymore… he knows my weakness… he can see right through me. He knows how to touch me to make me melt… how to make me scream. This is intimacy… this raw unhidden truth… this knowledge of me. His fingers advance up.. finding my swollen clit and begins lavishing it with attention… till every wall my mind has built is in a pile of rubble.

He senses this… and in a smooth move… he is on top of me. The tip of his cock nudges against my soaked hole. He stays there… tempting me to slid down on him…. or perhaps to tease me.. to make me helpless with lust. His lips meet mine… they mingle.. tongues brushing each other in a dance of sorts. A tango of passion.

There is no roughness… its pure… its love… its naked need… the need to push past the angry words said… the hurt that was caused- to make it all better… to mend those wounds. Its intensity that you feel deep inside… the offer of yourself… to where you are truly naked…

>what a night

>So last Saturday night was rather interesting to say the least. Ben had to work on Sunday, which is usually one of our days off together, and we’d have to go to bed early on Saturday so he could get up on time for work. I really didn’t want to do this… and the girls had invited me to go clubbing with them. I wanted to do that and Ben told me to go and have fun.

We had plans to leave a little early cause we had free passes and didn’t want to get passed the free admission time…. but surprise… we didn’t. My friends Dionna and Angela are notorious for being late. Turns out there we eight of us going, which included me, so we took two cars.

Once we got there… Angela was already hammered. We headed to the club (the Vault) and got in fairly quickly. Not many people were there but we made a beeline to the bar. We weren’t leaving for at least three hours so I knew it would be safe to have just one drink (and I did.. I’m a good girl).

After we all got our drinks we stood around just bullshitting. Angela was being goofy like always and she was dancing backwards out onto the empty floor. She didn’t care.. she was that far gone. Jared said he wanted to go to Jake’s, another club around the corner. I couldn’t have agreed more.. it was pretty dead.

So we all headed to Jake’s… Jared ended up paying for half the people to get in and told them if he did they had to stay for a while. Everyone was down for that. Once inside we all headed to the dance floor.

We weren’t there twenty minutes when Dionna and her friend, Rose, decided they wanted to go back to the Vault. Somewhere along the line, we ran into Ben (see a few posts back). Ben offered to buy Angela a drink.. even though she certainly didn’t need another one. Personally I think he was trying to fuck her… but that is just my thought.

Dionna started getting upset with Angela… I broke in between them to cool the situation. I told Dionna I’d take care of her and for them to just go ahead and go back to the other club. I gave Angela a glass of water, made her drink it, and pulled her ass back out on the floor to dance.

Soon Angela decided she needed to go to the bathroom and said she’d be back. Fifteen minutes passed and I was starting to wonder where she was. I asked Jared’s friends and him if they had seen her… which they hadn’t. Jared and I decided that we’d go look for her if she wasn’t back by the end of the song.

Sure enough, she wasn’t so we headed to the bathroom. No Angela. His friends and I looked through the club and went outside. No Angela. Jared and I went back inside… I sent him into the men’s bathroom just in case she was just that drunk. No Angela. We swept the club..again then back outside. No Angela.

We decided to go over to the Vault just in case… left his friends outside Jake’s. Just as we turned the corner.. off by the Vault was Angela bebopping down the side walk. I yelled out to her… asked her what she was doing.. and told her never to do that again… I was sooo worried. I thought something bad had happened. This is where she says she went looking for Dionna but couldn’t find her.

So into the Vault we go. No Dionna or Rose. We go back to Jakes… they are not there either… and now we’ve managed to loose Jared’s friends. Ugh. Angela in tow we go back to the Vault… up the stairs… we finally run into two of his friends, Robert and Sierra (wild huh?). Angela takes them downstairs to go dance.

Jared and I continue on our hunt for our drunken friends. Down the stairs we go… when lo and behold.. there is Dionna and April. I’m irritated by now and just want to go home. I felt like we were babysitting. Finally we all managed to be on the dance floor but were missing Robert. Jared texts him… he’s at Jake’s.

So the world is right again… I go outside and sit down.. it is like 1 am. After a few minutes of a breather I go back in.. dance a little bit but am not having much fun. Jared and I decide we want to go home… so we start rounding everyone up…. or so we think. By 1:30 we head outside… just the two of us.. thinking they are following us.

We soon find out they are not.. and we sit outside freezing our asses off waiting for them because we cannot go back in now. Around 1:45 Robert comes rolling up talking about how he just had the best conversation with some guy and his girlfriend. So here we are… waiting…. freezing.

Finally the girls come rolling out. Dionna, Angela, and Rose are all falling over each other. Angela and Rose decide to take their shoes off… I hurry them along… eager to get home by then. They decide they want a hot dog outside of Jake’s.

This is where I took Jared’s friends and piled them in my car leaving Jared with Angela, Dionna, and Rose. We four get in my car and start our hour drive home. I call Jared a few times but get no answer… thinking they just must have the music loud and don’t worry.

I’m about 20 miles out of town when my phone rings.. its Jared.

“Hey Jare Bear… how’s everything- oh you’re IPOD is in my glove box, right?”

“Yeah it is… but we have a problem- you might need to come back”

“What?”, I said as I pulled the car off the road.

“The girls got into a fight and now Dionna won’t let Angela in the car.”

I sigh… get a little bit of the story and ask for Dionna to be put on the phone.

“Hey Dionna… you need to get in the car.. Jared is going to drive you guys home”

The response I get is somewhat calm but soon turns to her bashing Angela. I’m getting more and more upset saying that we are all going home tonight and she needs to just get in the car. By the end Im screaming for her to “get in the fucking car” then tell her to give the phone back to Jared.

I tell him that I don’t care what happens… get them in the car.. we’re going home. In th background I can hear Angela screaming and tell him to let me talk to her. Again I’m calm at first but become pretty agitated quickly… telling her to get in the car. She says she would but Dionna won’t let her.

By now I’m pissed and tell her to give the phone back to Jared.

“I’m coming back and you tell those fuckers I’m pissed cause this is bullshit.”

I end the call. There is no exits near to turn around so instead I use one of this turn arounds that is illegal for people to use. I didn’t care… I was pissed… I was tired.. and I wanted to go home.

Half way back Jared and I are on the phone again… nothing has changed… told him I’d be there in ten minutes.

I just pull off the exit… going around the curves quickly with two passed out drunk people in my backseat when my phone rings. It’s Jared- they’ve got into the car. By then I had had it. I told him to stay there because I had not just drove back twenty miles just to turn around again.

I pull up shortly after.. get out of the car… slam the door. I go up to a quiet SUV and begin to lay into them.

“This is bullshit… why did I have to come back and deal with this? I’ve babysat all night and all I want to do is go home”.

Angela has her arms crossed staring out the window.. Dionna is doing the same. This is where Dionna lays into Angela again.. I scream that I dont care what happened.

“Jared give me my keys and get out” Dionna said

“NO! We’re all going home tonight.. Jared is driving you guys home” I screamed.

“I’m just going to sleep here”, she said back.

I start to freak out again… that we are ALL going home and Jared is driving. Then I snatch open Angela’s door realizing that Jared would not have a peaceful drive home.

“Get out of the car! You’re going with me… GET OUT OF THE CAR!”.

By then I’m freaking out and Angela is franticly trying to get out. Once securely in my car.. we all leave. Angela rants for like twenty minutes before she passes out.

The story as I get it now is this. Jared wanted a hot dog… but didn’t have any money left. Rose and Dionna were going to eat their hot dog in front of him and not give theirs up or buy him one. Angela called them out on it.. saying it was bullshit because Jared had babysat them all night and was being their designated driver.

Apparently this is where all hell broke loose and I was called.

Through the drive home.. Jared and I called each other to check in. We were like ten minutes away from home when I get a call from him (its almost 4 am by now).

Dionna’s car ran out of gas this time. Seriously… if anything else could go wrong.

I sigh.. turn around… AGAIN. Go get gas and a gas can to get them off the side of the road. $17 later I’m helping put the gas in the car so we can all just go home.

I dropped Jared’s friends off at his house… went and picked up Jared and Rose from Dionna’s house then dropped them off. By the time I made it home it was a little after 4:30 am. I climbed into bed and wished I had just stayed home that night.

Seriously it was a night from hell… I’ve decided never to be a DD for them ever again.. or if I do… to not babysit… but that is unlikely. I cannot explain how happy I was to be in bed next to Ben when I got home… it was a great feeling.