Day 13: Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you? Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?

The appeal.. that’s easy.  It fills a part of me that was missing before.  So many people seek something that they are missing… a relationship… a rewarding job… a new hobby… and for me… it was control.  There is something about it that spoke to me… that comforted me.    I felt like it just fit and that I’d found where and what I was meant to be.

How could I not be drawn to something that feels like home?  I love the way Ben’s control over me makes me feel.  It makes me feel like I’m in my spot in the world.  And when we have a scene… there is that lovely floaty space that it can take me to.  This strange little high… where the adrenaline courses through me.  Euphoria is how I would describe it best.  Pure happiness that very little can even touch.

Someone who’s never had that experience couldn’t possibly understand.  It’s like craving a food… and finally getting that first little bite.  Once you have it…. you breath in… and a appreciative moan is uttered.  It’s like the most amazing thing you’ve ever tasted.  It’s heaven.  That’s what a good spanking does for me… every time.  It’s like the most amazing food I’ve ever had… for more than just that moment.

That is the appeal.. it’s pure heaven.  And it’s addictive.

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